You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Randomize
