yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
