I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I still have a little drunk in my system
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
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