I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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