That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
