Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize