1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
