I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
