I can tuck mytits in my pants
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
