My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
