my vag is so smooth its legendary
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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