that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
