Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Blow job season was short but glorious.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
Randomize
