somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
