Buhtt sex?
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
I see more hoeing in ur future
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
