You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Randomize
