Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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