dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
You're like the curious george of whores
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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