Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
