We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize
