everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
tell me about the fingering
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