its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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