Pregnant stripper...not hot.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
