Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
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