I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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