i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Randomize
