Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
