I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Randomize