I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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