Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Randomize
