True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I don't think brook has ever known best
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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