The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
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