I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize