"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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