they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
