Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
