You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
