remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Enjoy the penises
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Randomize
