My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
