Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize
