There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize