Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Randomize
