It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
