Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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