Porn is love you can see.
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize