Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
It's blow job season.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize