the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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