I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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