how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Is it because I queefed?
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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