if i died would you start the facebook group?
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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