Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Randomize
